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What Indian men face when matrimonial cases are filed decades after marriage

False cases decades after marriage
False cases decades after marriage

In this article, we will discuss the plight of married men when they face fake matrimonial cases, decades after their marriage. Most of them are oblivious to what is coming for them, and are caught by nasty surprise. Many incidents are coming out where cases are being filed 10, 15 or even 20 years after marriage. This article describes what they will/are going through after they get cases after decades of marriages. Many men have this misconception that they will not face 498a after 7 years of marriage. They are horribly mistaken. Wife can file 498a anytime claiming she was harassed mentally or physically recently. 498a is a Domestic Violence Law, not a Dowry Harassment only law. This is already discussed here.

Maintenance is guaranteed

A wife who files a maintenance after 10+ years of marriage is guaranteed to get maintenance, even if she is the one who deserted her husband. Most Indian women quite job after 5-10 years of marriage and become full time housewives. This is extremely dangerous scenario for husbands. Courts grant interim maintenance almost instantly, thinking that the wife is a destitute and needs husband’s money to survive. So men are immediately screwed in DV Act or CrPC 125 or HAMA 18 or HMA 24 or SMA 36 sections. Maintenance is discussed in detail in this article.

Children almost always go with Mother

Child custody laws though neutral on paper, always favor women. When a Father is toiling at his workplace to provide for his family, his children are spending maximum time with their mother. When a case is filed 15-20 years of the marriage, they almost always go with their mother. Women also wait for their children to reach adolescence to file cases or get separated. This ensures the most difficult part of childhood is completed with the support of their husband, and then they can reap the rewards alone. So forget your children once your wife separates decades after marriage. In fact, there are many cases when children have betrayed Fathers in courts.

No Support from Parents or Family friends

If a man has to fight matrimonial cases at age of 40-45+, he gets almost no support from Parents or friends. At that age, everyone is busy with their own lives so they can’t spend much time with the man. Parents are also very old, and need attention and care from their son. So it becomes a lonely battle and most men give in to the demands of their wives just to have some peace. Imagine giving up almost everything you earned in your life to your wife just to have some peace? It is an extremely horrible situation.

Joint Property=GONE

If a man has done the biggest mistake of buying property on jointly with his wife, then it is as good as gone when wife files matrimonial cases. Courts will allow her to stay in that house, and she will make sure to take complete possession till the cases run for years. The man can file Recovery Suite or Declaration Suite, but those also run at their own snail’s pace, hardly yielding any results in the man’s favor. In fact, along with the Husband, his parents can also be thrown out of their own house under DV Act 2005. Recent Supreme Court ruling has made sure of that. Supreme Court has also said that Son is Son till marriage, but daughter remains daughter for life. However, courts never ask the Daughters to seek their rights from their parents. They take the property rights from her husband and in-laws and give it to her. So at age of 40+, the man has to search for a suitable rented accommodation for himself and his parents and also continue paying the monthly EMI for the house he “jointly” bought with his wife.

This judgement goes for a toss when a Daughter in Law seeks right to residence in her in-laws house

Wife from different city/state=Nightmare

If the wife belongs to a different city or state, then it is a huge nightmare. She will go to her parent’s house and file all the case in the court there. Supreme Court has already given full rights to women to file all cases from the place they reside, irrespective of where the matrimonial home was located. The husband will have to then travel to that city’s court regularly. Vast majority of Indian courts lack video conferencing facilities so only option is to attend the dates in person. Missing dates by the husband can lead to an atrocious Ex Parte order in favor of the wife. Traveling almost 4 days a month makes managing expenses almost impossible, and if the man has ailing parents then his life becomes a nightmare. Below is a latest news snippet about an Indian Army Soldier who is being harassed by his wife and is asking how can he serve the country when he has to travel regularly to fight cases. Such news are rarely covered by English media as most of them are hardcore Feminists or funded by Feminists.

Image
Soldier who is harassed by his wife saying whether he should travel to courts or serve country

Extra Trouble for NRIs

These laws are nightmare for NRIs. Imagine being a Green Card holder or even a Citizen in US, enjoying a plush IT Job, raking in the money, but losing everything because you committed the grave mistake of marrying an Indian woman? This is exactly what happens when wife suddenly decides to come back to India and file all available cases on Husband. The Ministry of External Affairs site itself suggests Indian women to file 498a on their husbands in case they are abandoned. So any woman is free to come back to India, and file 498a on their husbands claiming she was abandoned. The FAQ can be downloaded from here. Since almost all laws in Developed countries require evidence and punish false accusers, Indian women run back to India and enjoy the weapons given to them by India’s lethargic and ancient Judicial system.

Screengrab of FAQ from MEA website which suggests filing 498a to Indian women

Once FIR is filed, Police know that there is lot of money to be made from a NRI. Red Corner Notices are issued, passports are impounded. Basically a man loses everything if cases are filed in India. Only way to avoid this is to forget about India and live like a fugitive in foreign country. Also. lower courts are quick to grant huge maintenance to NRI husbands without considering the foreign currency expenses in respective countries. Overall, its a special kind of hell when a well settled NRI faces matrimonial cases in India. In fact, the notoriety of 498a is well documented on website of a New York Law Firm.

Conclusion

I have covered a few major pain points if a man faces fake cases in his 40s or decades after marriage. If you are man in your 40s, and you have a fear that your marriage may turn sour any time (always listen to your gut feeling), you have to start acting now to safeguard yourselves. You can seek help at MensRights.Net and hope for the best. Also a request to NRIs: PLEASE STOP MARRYING INDIAN WOMEN. This is for your own good.

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Blog Post

How to overcome the common roadblocks in following MGTOW lifestyle

MGTOW

In last article, I discussed why MGTOW lifestyle is so appealing to modern men. However, there are many roadblocks or deterrents which prevent or make it difficult for men to follow MGTOW, especially Indian men. India is largely a conservative society, so there are quite a few unique challenges for men to follow MGTOW. I will explain each of them, and try to give solutions for each one. However, following MGTOW depends on a man’s resolve and self control. Men who crumble under peer pressure can never follow MGTOW lifestyle. I am not discussing “Society” here because MGTOW don’t care about society.

Parents

Parents are the biggest deterrent of MGTOW in India. In India, parents are used to controlling their children’s lives as they see fit. The most common situation is that unmarried men are controlled by their parents, and married men are controlled by their wives. Parents simply cannot imagine their son being single for whole life. They fear what society will say or how they will face the society when they will ask questions about their unmarried son. Parents also think that since their marriage lasted long, their son’s will too. Even after knowing the situation of laws, they will have a false sense of security that it won’t happen to them.

Solution: First of all, be independent. Don’t depend on your parents, especially financially. Move out of parent’s house if possible. Explain your parents about the biased laws in detail. Show them the videos of in-laws being beaten up by daughter-in-laws, and the cases being filed on in-laws even if they are the ones being harassed. There are many videos, news available. Show them the extremely biased and hopeless Court judgements like asking men to pay maintenance by begging or borrowing or stealing, or to pay millions in alimony to a cruel wife. If they are sensible, they will realize that world has changed for the bad, and safety of themselves and their son is in MGTOW lifestyle. A good parent will be happy if their kids are happy. So show them that you are more happy being a MGTOW.

Girlfriend

Many guys come to know about MGTOW when already in relationship (most times with a toxic girlfriend) and are fearful about what would she do if they broke up. They fear about false rape cases or false domestic violence cases as discussed here. So getting out of relationship is not that easy. There are way too many cases where girlfriends are filing rape cases after boyfriend breaks up, and are forcing them to marry.

Solution: Make your girl break up, rather than you breaking up. This needs to be planned meticulously, depending upon the girl’s likes and dislikes. Start behaving slowly like a person she hates or has no interest in. Almost all women/girls are insanely hypergamous, so use that at your advantage. Always talk about how scared are you are of your job, and cry randomly. Act emasculated in front of her. No woman likes an emasculated man. Call her later at night saying you are really scared. If she asks you to visit psychiatrist, get real angry or shout on her. Lower your sexual performance. Start liking or showing attraction towards other religion. Start smelling bad, become too clingy. All depends on what your girl doesn’t like. DON’T under any circumstances try to go after other girls or praise other girls to make her jealous. That doesn’t work, it might make her more possessive of you or she can file fake rape case immediately.

Friend Circle

If your friend circle is full of blue pilled guys/beta males/simps, you will find that they will discourage you from following MGTOW lifestyle. Even they are married, and they are unhappy in the marriages (trust me, 95% of men aren’t happy, no matter what they tell you), they will still encourage you to marry. Even if they are supportive, you will find it awkward to hang out with them. Going on trips with them will be impossible, as all their trips will involve their wives, as almost no married woman allows their husbands to go on men only trips. So you will feel odd one out. Some of their wives might even flirt with you or come on to you, further creating awkward situations.

Solution: A true friend will always support your decision. Change friend circle if you don’t have such friends. Almost every major city in India has men fighting for fake cases. You can find such groups on MensRights.Net. They have weekly meets, trips, tours etc. You can even travel solo. Many people enjoy solo traveling, as you are free to take your own decisions. You can join online communities, clubhouse meets to find like minded people. Don’t let your friends decide what you want to do or what you want to be.

The want of a Successor

Many men marry because they want a successor or heir. Going MGTOW means they wont have a successor, and this is what compels them to fall into the marriage trap. Some are even against adoption, they want their DNA to be passed on. Many men have married just to make sure their precious lineage is alive, but have ended up with daughters.

Solution: Don’t ruin your life for something that happens after your death. Adoption is an easy solution to this problem. Personally, I feel that unless you have some Super Hero genes or are from a royal historic family, your DNA is not that special to pass on to next generation. Adopt a baby, give that child a life he deserves. (Single men can’t adopt a female child in India). If you really really want to have a biological child, move to a country which has surrogacy laws that support surrogates for single men. Another solution is to just not worry about a successor, and donate all your wealth and property to your sibling’s kids or to a Men’s Rights organization of your choice.

Old Age

Another major reason that causes men to marry is worrying about old age. They think if they don’t have wife and kids, no one will take care of them in old age, and they will lead a miserable life.

Solution: Such men are unaware about the cases filed by wives after 20, sometimes 30 years of marriage. Sometimes cases are filed with participation of kids. Also, many senior citizens are getting harassed by their daughter in laws, and courts have already given right to residence to such daughter in laws. So there is no guarantee of a peaceful old age life even if you have a family. If you are a man facing fake cases like 498a or DV Act, just look at your parents. Do you want to suffer the same fate in your old age? Moreover, if you are MGTOW, you will have saved so much money that you can move to a country with best old age home in the world, and enjoy your twilight age in peace and harmony.

Conclusion

I have tried to include all the major reasons that act as roadblock or deterrents for MGTOW lifestyle, especially in India. I didn’t include religion because most religions already allow for celibate/single lifestyle (Bhramacharya/Sanyas in Hinduism, Monks in Buddhism etc.). If there are any other major reasons, please post them in comments. I will try to cover them.

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Why is MGTOW lifestyle so appealing to modern men?

In past articles, I have explained what is MGTOW, various levels of MGTOW and dangers of having relationships and marriages in India. In this article, I will try to cover why is MGTOW lifestyle so appealing, especially in 2021. Remember, MGTOW is a way of life, not a movement.

MGTOW Life

No fake cases/allegations

Lets cover the most obvious one first. Many men spend their most productive years, either fighting fake cases or in fear of fake cases. The fake allegations of rape, sexual harassment, domestic violence are extremely common all across the world. If you are a MGTOW, you don’t have to deal with all this at all. You keep minimum female contact, and hence are almost immune to fake allegations. Only thing is to avoid fake Sexual Harassment claims at workplace, by following simple discipline like not talking to female colleagues in closed meeting rooms, not hanging out with them, and keeping minimum required professional contact. If you are an entrepreneur, then even better, you can completely avoid female contact, and avoid fake allegations.

Power of autonomy

Almost all decisions of married men/men in relationships (lets call them non-MGTOW from now on) are not autonomous. They have to either get approval from their partner, or just do what they say. Otherwise they have to bear days of nagging and whining, which can lead to fake allegations if you ever take a stand. Don’t let other men fool you, not a single non-MGTOW man is autonomous. Modern women are extremely controlling, and the laws have made them unapologetic about exercising control. Being MGTOW gives you complete control on your own life. This can be a liberating experience. You want to sit at home on weekend doing absolutely nothing? You can do that. You want to travel to some scenic spot alone at 5 AM in morning? You can do that. Complete autonomy over your own life.

Pursue Hobbies Unrestricted

One more big limitation of non-MGTOW men is that they either have to give up their hobbies or follow them in limited sense. Their partners tend to look down upon their hobbies. For example, if you liked Gaming before, you pretty much have to give it up because the woman will never allow you to spend time and money on anything other than her. I know a case when a guy bought a powerful kickass speaker setup, but couldn’t gather courage to tell his wife about it. He kept it in his car for 2 weeks, waiting for the right time to tell her, and when he finally told her, she asked him to return it because it was too “costly”. So what is the point of making money if you can’t spend it how you want? Other hobbies like watching sports with your buddies are also frowned upon by women. As MGTOW, you are free to follow your hobbies and have recreational time at your own leisure and convinience.

Stress free life and work

How many times have you heard from non-MGTOW men that they want to earn more to provide a comfortable life for their wife and kids? You can see them sucking up to their bosses or working 12 hours a day, for that elusive promotion so that they can keep meeting the demands of their kids and wife. During time of layoffs, they are extremely stressed, worrying about their kid’s school fees or their house EMIs. The heart attacks among young men are at all time high, major reasons being overwork and stress. As MGTOW, you will not be worried about this. Whatever you earn is sufficient and even a job loss affect you that much, if your savings are good. You don’t have to work 12 hours a day if you don’t want to OR you can work 16 hours a day if that is what you enjoy. There will be no one waiting at home crying that you are not giving them enough time and attention. You can fulfil your professional goals easily. There are many examples of MGTOW inventors and celebrities to follow. Nikola Tesla is a perfect example.

Save more money

Its a known fact that a man’s 1/3rd savings are spent on his wife/girlfriend, whether she is earning or not. Then once you have kids, even more is spent on their school. You are stuck in this vicious circle of being a provider for life. As MGTOW, you can save way more compared to non-MGTOW. And then you can spend on whatever you want, no restrictions. Even if a MGTOW is at several levels below a non-MGTOW guy in same company, he would save more. If you want to save more money, which will be spent as per your wish, MGTOW is the way.

Conclusion

These are just few points I covered as advantages for being MGTOW and how they make MGTOW appealing. You can add more in comments. In next article, I will cover what are the roadblocks or factors that prevent men from fully embracing MGTOW lifestyle, and how to overcome them, especially in India.

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#MensLivesMatter trended in India at number 3, and Feminists hated it

Indian men decided to unite together on Twitter, and trended hashtag #MensLivesMatter on Friday 20th August, around 9 PM IST. This trend was to signify that men’s life matter too, and was in support of a recent Petition filed by two law students in Supreme Court of India. The petition filed by Anam Kamil and Shrikant Prasad, seeks Supreme Court’s directions to Indian Government to make the plethora of Indian laws Gender Neutral. They have argued that the laws were made over 150 years ago, and their misuse has reached unprecedented levels, and men need protection too. Recent violent incidents against men also got good media coverage and social media support, even though the perpetrators were left unpunished. Some top tweets in #MensLivesMatter trend below:

This trend lasted for over 12 hours at number 3 position, and kept trending for whole day of 22nd August. This riled up the Indian feminists, who couldn’t digest the fact that men are tweeting for themselves, instead of simping for them and falling for their “women are always oppressed” narrative.

Some screenshots/Tweets of Indian Feminists and SIMPs:

https://twitter.com/anna_annarose/status/1428953920479678467?s=20

Obviously, Men’s Rights Activists were quick to respond with facts and examples of historical misandry, for which feminists didn’t have any answer:

The fact that this trend had over 50k tweets showed that at least some Indian men have woken up and are uniting against systemic exploitation of men in India, and there is not much the Feminists and SIMPS can do about it.

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Why Indian men/boys shouldn’t have relationships?

In earlier series of “Why Indian men shouldn’t marry?” I discussed why it is not a good idea for Indian men to marry, thanks to India’s legal framework which is setup for exploitation of married men. In this post, I will explain why Indian men/boys shouldn’t even consider having relationships in India. Having a romantic relationship or even casual fling is extremely risky in India for males. Similar to marital laws, India has a plethora of draconian, illogical and heavily biased women “protection” laws. And no, we can’t blame the Britishers for these laws as some like POCSO or DV Act were enacted way after India became independent, but were still drafted like it is 1857. If you have a relationship, and if it breaks, then the girl has a number of laws to send you to jail if she wants to teach you a lesson for dumping her. I will cover them in detail below.

Reality of Rapes in India
74% acquittal rate in 2019, out of which 70% cases were filed for consensual sex

Consensual Sex in India before marriage=RAPE

India’s Rape law is quite special. First of all, as soon as a rape complaint is filed by a woman, the accused HAS to be arrested by police (unless accused is a celebrity). No evidence needed. In fact, after the “Nirbhaya” candle marches in 2012, women can refuse medical tests at the time of lodging complaint, and FIR will still be registered. Moreover, any woman can claim she repeatedly had consensual sex with her boyfriend for years, and it was rape because he promised to marry her sometime in future. Yes, you read it right, as per Indian law, women are so stupid that they can sleep with anyone who promises to marry, and if they do so, they are considered as rape victims. No other country in the world has such provision. When these laws were drafted, probably government thought that women will rarely lie about getting raped, which was probably true in 90s, but post 2012, there has been a flood of such cases. Women have become expert liars, and thanks to Supreme Court’s judgement about hiding identity of rape victim and have closed trials in courts, no one knows if a woman has filed a rape complaint. So this has become a sure shot weapon to wreck vengeance on the boyfriends for dumping them, and since arrest of the boyfriend is imminent, most of them either pay up or end up marrying the women under pressure. Yearly, over 16000 men are jailed for having consensual sex in India. Screenshot from National Crime Records Bureau’s 2019 data below. Also, the man/boy doesn’t even need to have sex with the girl to become a rapist in India. I have seen Chargesheet for a rape case, where an arranged marriage broke up, and the girl filed rape complaint. Only evidence needed was a photo with the guy at some café, and a medical report saying she is capable of having intercourse. That’s it.

2019 NCRB Data for Rape
In 2019; 16,311 men were jailed for having consensual sex in India

POCSO

I have covered POCSO briefly earlier. Protection Of Children from Sexual Offenses act came into enforcement in 2012. It is used to punish sexual offences against minors (under 18 as per India’s age of consent). Even though the victims can be of either gender, the act becomes extremely biased when the complainant and the accused are both minors. So, if a 15 year old boy has a sexual relationship with a 17 year old girl, as per POCSO, the boy becomes the rapist and girl becomes the victim. Isn’t this bafflingly absurd? The people who drafted this act forgot to apply common sense and didn’t cover all possible scenarios. A 17 year old boy was sentenced to life imprisonment under POCSO for having consensual sex with a 15 year old girl. In another most shocking incident, a 13 year old younger brother was sent to detention center under POCSO, as his 16 year old porn addict sister forced him to have sex , and she became pregnant. So if you are a teenage boy, and have decided to romance teenage girls, beware, she or her family can send you to jail for life under POCSO.

16 year old boy was booked for kidnapping and raping his 17.5 year old girlfriend

Live-in Relationships are Domestic Relationships

As per Indian Judiciary, couples in Live-in relationship are in a Domestic Relationship, so the woman can file complaint under DV Act 2005, which is already discussed here. So after breakup, the woman can easily file a case on the man under DV Act and demand maintenance, right to residence etc. So in addition to Rape case, the man in a Live-in relationship can be harassed by DV Act as well. So a Live-in relationship is potentially more dangerous than marriage. Though at least his parents will be safe, so there’s that.

Conclusion

Even if conviction data shows that most of the Rape cases filed in India are fake, and over 50% are in the category of “Consensual sex on promise of marriage”, the Indian Judiciary is doubling down on making the law more draconian. Recently, a High Court while using textbook Feminist language demanded a separate Rape law for promise of marriage, and another High Court declared that unmarried women don’t engage in carnal desires unless there is a promise to marry. Yes, these absurd judgements are from 2021, and not 1921. This is going to become worse, as Supreme Court recently said that conviction in rape case can be based solely on statement of complainant, even if there is no medical evidence and there are minor contradictions in the statement. So along with marriage, relationships are also extremely risky for Indian men, as the laws are drafted in such a way that men are completely screwed if their partner decides to abuse the laws.

PS: If you are facing false cases, please join MensRights.Net for assistance.

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Marya Shakil & Babita Phogat mock Indian Male Athletes during Tokyo Olympics

India is a land of diverse cultures and religions. However, historically, this diversity has been misused by the conquerors and invaders by applying the strategy of Divide & Rule. The Moghuls used it, and so did the Britishers. The strategy is used by Indian politicians as well, and it works wonders to divide the votes and create different categories of vote banks. Earlier, this division used to majorly happen on the basis of religion, caste or region. However, since past 15-20 years, the focus is more on dividing the society based on Gender. This is evident in various Women Appeasement policies and laws enacted by Governments of all political parties across India.

Recently, this Gender divide became mainstream during the Tokyo Olympics 2020 (2021), when every single medal won by any Indian woman athlete was praised as “Girl Power” or “Woman Power” or “Smashing the Patriarchy”. Most of these terms were used by Feminists and the SIMPS/Betas. Indian Feminists, who usually copy the next made up “hip” thing from Western Feminists, like “Toxic Masculinity”, “Smash the Patriarchy”, “Gender Pay Gap”, tried hopelessly to demand equal pay for Indian women cricketers, same as Indian men cricketers. This brainless and illogical demand was shot down by Indian woman cricketer Smriti Mandhana, and the demands of equal pay in cricket ended with a whimper.

However, some prominent Indian women, mocked the Indian men for not winning medals at Tokyo Olympics 2020, in its initial days. Such was their impatience, that they didn’t even wait for Olympics to finish, and mocked the men athletes via tweets. One such tweet was by Indian journalist Marya Shakil, who is actually winner of Ramnath Goenka Excellence in Journalism Awards as Best Political Journalist (Broadcast) in 2012. She tweeted:

Marya Shakil mocks Indian male athletes

The tweet is TweetStamped here. As it is clearly visible, she just couldn’t contain the opportunity to mock Indian men, and question their capabilities, when 3 Indian women athletes won medals. Such biased women hold prominent positions in Indian media, and are responsible for forming public opinion.

Not too far behind was Indian Olympian, Babita Phogat. Despite being an athlete and Olympian herself, she mocked the Indian men after Indian woman athlete PV Sindhu won the medal. Below is her tweet:

Babita Phogat questions the capabilities Indian male athletes

The tweet is tweetstamped here. Tweets like these showed utter disregard to efforts put by Indian male athletes, and they didn’t even care about what effect will such tweets have on morale and psyche of the Athletes competing in Olympics.

There were countless other tweets comparing Indian men athletes to Dowry seekers, saying Indian men can only depend on women to bring gold, despite the fact that all Indian Olympic gold medals have been won by men, and 95% of Dowry harassment cases in India are fake.

In not so crazy and totally expected turn of events, Indian men then won more medals (4 out of 7 medals), and Neeraj Chopra actually won another Gold Medal in later days of the Olympics. So far, not a single Indian woman has won a Gold medal in history of Olympics. And as an extra twist of fate, India’s Women wrestler Vinesh Phogat, the sister of aforementioned Babita Phogat who mocked Indian male athletes, was temporarily suspended by Wrestling Federation of India, for indiscipline during Tokyo Olympics 2020.

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Why Indian men shouldn’t marry? Part 5: The Impossible Divorce

In Part 4 we covered how Parental Alienation and POCSO misuse can ruin a man’s life. In this part we will see how/if a man can get divorce from his wife in India. The Indian society and Judiciary is still living in the 1970s. They think that any Indian husband wanting separation from his wife is a criminal and the wife is a helpless victim. So getting divorced in India as a man is literally impossible. Recently, Apex court of India has convinced a woman to take back her cases because if her husband goes to jail, he won’t be able to pay maintenance and ended the separation of 21 years. In one case, the Supreme Court threatened the husband of jail, if he didn’t behave with his wife. We will cover this painful reality in detail.

Contested Divorce=Waste of Time

In India, contested divorce should be renamed as Impossible Divorce. Contested divorce means when an opposite party decides that he/she will ruin the life of the spouse wanting separation, by using the snail paced judiciary at their advantage. When a man files a contested divorce in India, his wife first files entire Fake case package discussed in Part 1 and Part 2 in detail, whether she wants to continue marriage or not. Some do this to get better alimony amount and property (read: extortion), some do just for ego, some do this to threaten the husband so that he takes divorce petition back or some do this just for harassment and sadistic pleasure. Any woman who goes to a lawyer once her husband files divorce, is presented with this fake case package. Most women who are at fault, opt for this readily. Then begins a cat and mouse game of fake cases, court dates, mediations etc. Remember, for Divorce cases, you get a one court date per month (some times once in two months), so at max you get 12 dates per year. In most cases, first 5 to 6 dates are wasted by the wife just to even appear in court, and rest 5-6 dates are wasted by not filing Written Statement (her reply to husband’s petition). So just like that, almost 1 or 2 years are gone, and husband’s situation remains exactly the same, minus the money he spent on lawyer. And then wife’s lawyer uses all the tactics available in the book like asking for mediation, adjournments etc. and around 3-4 years are totally wasted.

Divorce in Higher Courts=More pain

If by some magic, or sheer luck, a husband gets a divorce in lower court/family court, the wife is free to challenge it in Higher courts. So the entire cycle begins again. As the level of courts increases, lawyer fees increase too. Also, High Courts of a state are usually in state capitals or bigger cities, so if you are not located there, husbands have to travel. It just adds on to the misery and time wastage. This simple problem can be solved by making Video conferencing a norm in Indian court hearings, but such sensible decisions are almost never taken in India. Now you must be wondering why the wife will waste her own age fighting cases for years, when the marriage is already broken? No one knows for sure. Its either her extreme stupidity OR lack of sensible parents/friends/well wishers OR just sheer ego/audacity that consumes her sanity and she fights on and on, till she reaches Menopause. There have been instances where husband got divorce for a 20 days marriage after 19 years, and wife has still challenged it in High Court. In one case, wife hid her heart disease from husband, and fought divorce for 16 years. In another case, wife filed multiple fake cases on Husband, cost him his job, and still fought Divorce for 12 years.

Mutual Consent Divorce

Mutual Consent Divorce (MCD) is a divorce in which both husband and wife get separated by agreeing mutually. This case lasts for 6 months (sometimes even a week if 6 months separation period is waived off) in court. 90% of contested divorces end up as MCD. This usually happens when the wife finds her next extortion target and decides its not worth fighting her current husband endlessly. Or the current husband gets her trapped by winning the fake cases and filing criminal defamation or malicious prosecution or perjury. Or the husband just agrees to all demands of his wife. Most of the time, this decision is taken too late by the wife, and nothing meaningful remains in life of either the husband or the wife. Whatever could have happened within first 6 months of separation by cool headed spouses, happens after 6 or sometimes 10 years, because ego takes over common sense.

Conclusion

As you can see, filing divorce by a husband never ends well. I didn’t even cover the grounds of filing a divorce by a husband, or the evidences need to prove the grounds in court. This is simply pointless, as the time to show evidences in court comes after 2-3 years of filing a Divorce case. This is why most MRA organizations never suggest husbands to file divorce. The only good solution to get separated peacefully is actually to never get married in the first place. I haven’t even covered the painful point about alimony and maintenance post divorce, where husbands have been asked to pay maintenance to their working divorced wife, even after their second marriage. Or when husband was asked to pay maintenance even after paying permanent alimony. Or when Supreme Court of India asked Husband to give his wife a house worth Rs 1 crore, despite finding her guilty of cruelty.

With this, I have covered husbands have to go through in the 5 part series of “Why Indian Men shouldn’t marry?”. Please share this with all unmarried men of India, so that they know what is in store for them after marriage. The divorce rates are steadily increasing, they are already around 40% in top cities, and soon the country wide numbers will reach 30% in next 15 years or so.

PS: If an married man needs guidance on how to get separated from his wife, please join MensRights.Net.

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Why Indian men shouldn’t marry? Part 4: Parental Alienation, Shared Parenting & POCSO

In Part 1 we saw how Husband and his family can be jailed, in Part 2 I covered how his property is in danger and in Part 3 I covered how his life is in danger. In this part, I will cover if somehow a child is born in a toxic marriage, how that child is used as weapon by the wife, and how she is aided by judiciary and society. In India, the child custody laws though neutral on paper, are extremely biased against men and the plight of separated fathers is often neglected by society, media and judiciary. Lets cover these issues in detail.

Parental Alienation aided by Courts

Parental Alienation of Fathers

Many separated women use their children as tool for extortion or vengeance. Almost 60-70% of separated couples are separated during the woman’s pregnancy or just after a child is born. Maybe these are hormonal issues or just planned extortion by women, I don’t know. However, once a woman has custody of children & files cases, fathers are never allowed to even see the face of a child or talk on phone. Only way to do this is via filing Visitation Rights or Custody cases, but custody to father is rarely granted. Even if courts grant visitation rights, women rarely comply with them, as Courts never bother to book women under contempt of court. Worst part is that most of these visitation rights are granted conditionally, like pay maintenance and only then you can see children. This is normalized in courts. There have been extremely horrific incidents like mothers taking custody of children, denying visitation rights to father, and keeping the child at her mother’s place, and child was murdered. The Father didn’t even know the news till 1 week later. You can watch the father’s interview here. In many cases, women or her paramours have murdered the children, more examples here and here. Our “progressive” courts have already ruled that adulterous women can also have child custody. One of the worst cases in independent India is when a Divorced woman, who won the custody of her mentally ill son despite being in adultery, killed him for insurance. In some cases, women are teaching their kids to call their fathers as “uncle”, making their life even more miserable. Parental Alienation of Fathers is also a form of Child Abuse, and leads to more crime in fatherless society, mental issues in separated children etc., but I will cover that in detail in some future topic.

Shared Parenting & POCSO

Shared Parenting is a child custody arrangement after divorce or separation, in which both parents share the responsibility of raising their child(ren), with equal or close to equal parenting time. Some developed countries have already made this a law, and efforts are being made by MRAs to implement this in India. Obviously, Feminists will oppose this as they have opposed this in Greece when it made Shared Parenting a law. In practice, couples which separate amicably, follow shared parenting in India. Some celebrity couples are good examples. In reality, if a man is dealing with a narcissistic/vengeful/BPD wife, implementation of Shared Parenting will be nothing short of nightmare. The child will be severely brainwashed by the woman, and the shared time will be spent by the man to remove the misconceptions. The misuse of POCSO (Protection Of Children from Sexual Offenses) Act will also become rampant. There have been many cases where women have falsely accused separated Husbands of sexually assaulting their children, and the men have spent time in jail. Most recent example is this, where the matter is subjudice, so we can’t really know the reality. So if Shared Parenting is not working between warring couples now, it will not work even after it becomes a law. However, it can probably dissuade women from using their children as weapon or extortion, as they know that they have to follow shared parenting anyways.

Conclusion

So if you are a married man and have children, your life and even your children’s life can be completely destroyed by the wife. Many men know this and go through extremely abusive marriages and toxic relationships just for their children. Many men have committed suicide, unable to bear the pain of being separated from their own children, and many have not even seen the face of their own kids as wife deserted them soon after pregnancy. This is going to become worse, as in US courts, there have been judgements where men have been asked to pay for child support for their non-biological children, just because the children considered him as father figure. It won’t take long for Indian courts to “copy” this selective legal precedence from developed world, and force Indian men to pay maintenance for their wife’s children born from adulterous relationships.

Simple solution to avoid this pain & suffering: DONT MARRY. In next and final part, I will cover Divorce and Separation.

PS: If you are separated from children and want child custody/visitation rights, please join MensRights.net and seek assistance.

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Why Indian men shouldn’t marry? Part 3: Husband Murder & Dowry Death

In Part 1 and Part 2 I have covered the laws which can make life of men hell after marriage, and in this part I will cover how their life is danger, either by hands of their wives or by hands of their In Laws. As I have mentioned earlier, Indian wives have TWO Domestic Violence laws, one more draconian than other, but there is absolutely nothing for men. Indian men are considered as third class citizens of the country. There are laws for women, children, animals and even trees, but no laws for men. So Indian women are free to beat their husbands, sometimes even to their death.

Husband Murder due to Adulterous wives

Ever since Adultery law was decriminalized, Husband Murder has become rampant in India. On average, around 400 Husbands are murdered by their wives (and sometimes by wife’s paramours) each year. But since these are deaths of men, the news never gets covered in National Media. We will hardly find any English media covering this news in detail, though local regional media carry such news regularly. I compiled a list of Husband Murders in 2019, and stopped after it reached 99 from November 2019 to July 2020, due to file size constraints in sharing.

Huband Murders In India.pdfDownload

There has been some coverage in Hindi Newspaper recently, so hopefully this gets covered in National Media and TV media. On Twitter, all such news are tagged by #HusbandMurder or #CrimeByBharatkiLaxmi.

Husband Murder

Husband Murder due to Domestic Violence

There has been remarkable increase in Husband Murder in India by violent wives too. Most of these women are suffering from personality disorders like Narcissistic Personality Disorder, Borderline Personality Disorder or Bipolar Disorder. Some are nymphomaniacs or suffering from Hysteria. Due to lack of mental health awareness in India, such women are never treated, and their parents think that after marriage, its the husband’s headache. Most of this results in Domestic Violence on Men after the marriage, and since men have no defense in Indian Judiciary or even in society, the choose to bear it for the “family” or “kids” or simply because they have nowhere to go. This has resulted in wives pouring burning oil over husbands, cutting their private parts, poisoning them, or straight up killing them in sleep. Below are some news clippings, which show that women have killed Husbands just for their looks or petty disputes.

  • Husband Murder in India
  • Husband Murder in India
  • Husband Murder in India
  • Husband Murder in India
  • Husband Murder in India
  • Husband Murder in India

Dowry Death

Now you might be surprised why Dowry Death is included in this blogpost. Many don’t know that any unnatural death of the wife within 7 years of the marriage, can be converted into Dowry Death by her parents.

Dowry Death
Dowry Death IPC

The real kicker is that, under section 113B of Indian Evidence Act, the court will presume that the death was caused by the accused (Husband/relatives). Any law which presumes accused as guilty from the get go, especially in matrimonial disputes, needs a serious rethink. So, unlike other crimes, onus is on the Husband to prove he is not the murderer. This is an extremely horrible situation for innocent husbands. and most of the time it is really difficult to avoid wrongful conviction. So if anyone’s wife, dies due to slipping in bathroom or due to electric shock or an unfortunate cylinder blast, his in laws can definitely turn her death into Dowry Death and harass the Husband and his family for money. Many instances in which this has been done and is rarely highlighted by media. Some examples here, here and here. Most recent case is of a woman dying while taking selfie with a loaded gun, and her father turning it into Dowry Death. If a Husband thinks that his parents will be safe if they are staying away from him, then he is sadly mistaken. Our “esteemed” Judiciary has made sure that even the parents living separately can be victimized under Dowry charges.

Conclusion

So we have discussed how a man’s and even his parent’s life is in threat after marriage, and there are absolutely no laws to act as a shield. Women can keep doing Domestic Violence, and sometimes even kill their Husbands. No national media house has ever highlighted this, despite alarming rise in Husband Murders. But a death of a woman is readily converted into Dowry Death, and everyone dedicates TV segments, tweets, online debates on unending “Dowry problem” in India.

As usual, simple solution to avoid all this: DON’T MARRY. In next Part, we will cover: Parental Alienation, Shared Parenting and POCSO.

PS: If you are facing Domestic Violence or false charges of Dowry Death, please join MensRights.Net.

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Why Indian men shouldn’t marry? Part 2: DV Act & CrPC 125

In the first part we covered how 498a can make life hell for married men in India. In Part 2, we will study how the two Civil/Quasi Civil cases can be used to make a married man’s life hell even further. I am clubbing these two together, as main incentive of both these cases is to absolutely exploit the married man financially till he completely breaks down. That being said, the recent Rajnesh Vs Neha Judgement by Indian Supreme Court has lowered the impact considerably when the wife is working or has worked before or is highly qualified. You can find more information about this on MensRights.net. But in case of Housewives/Homemakers, husbands are definitely screwed. We will now see how these both laws can screw up lives of married men by making them bonded slaves of wives for life.

Protection of Women from Domestic Violence Act 2005 (drafted by Feminist)

This law was drafted by a prominent Feminist lawyer in 2005, and became a law in 2006. Government and Feminists at that time felt that 498a wasn’t enough to harass the husband’s family, or they simply forgot that 498a exists, so they decided to gift this law to warring wives, who could afford a lawyer to file a court case. India is probably the only country in the world that has TWO DV laws for women. The DV Act case runs in Civil Court, and is quasi Civil in nature. It is a clumsily drafted law and is borderline unconstitutional, but hey, who cares as long as it overpowers women, right? The wife can file a case in Civil court under PWDVA 2005 against husband and his entire family. Her allegations need to be investigated by a Protection Officer, who needs to submit a DIR (Domestic Incident Report) after investigation. However, this process is rarely followed and clueless husbands are left on the mercy of their lawyers and judiciary.

Using this act, wives can demand below:

  • Right to Residence in Husband’s or Husband’s parent’s house
  • Interim and Permanent Maintenance (Free money)
  • Child Visitation (if by some miracle Husband has children with him)
  • Monetary Compensation

Again, almost all of this is provided as part of Interim Orders, which means none of the evidence is even considered. Domestic Violence itself is not clearly defined, as it includes physical, sexual, emotional and economic abuse. I have seen cases filed based on stuff like “I wasn’t given enough food”, “My mother in law taunted me” etc. When you keep such laws open to interpretation, misuse is bound to happen.

Right to Residence

This is the biggest pain point of DV Act 2005. Instead of creating DV Shelters for aggrieved women, Government and Judiciary decided it will best to provide shelter to women in the same home where she is facing the alleged Domestic Violence. So a woman can file a DV complaint, and apply for Right to Residence as Interim Relief in a house where she had a domestic relationship with her husband. This house can be her husband’s house or her in law’s house. And the Interim Orders are usually passed on 2nd or 3rd date of the court case. Earlier at least the Husband’s parent’s houses were safe, but now after this “landmark” (read biased) judgement by Indian Supreme Court a wife can take over any house she had a domestic relationship with the husband. The implications of these are huge, the elderly parents along with their son will be thrown out on streets, as usually it is impossible to live with their fake accuser Daughter In Law in the same household. There have been cases where families are living on rent and their Daughter In Law has taken over their entire multi-bedroom house for herself. So good luck owning a property in India if one wants to marry.

Interim Maintenance (Beg, Borrow or Steal)

Interim Maintenance is nothing but extortion. There is no Feminist in the world who can convince me that a woman who has means to file Civil court cases is unable to maintain herself. Wife makes tall demands like she is unable to survive, and puts on Interim Application to get hefty maintenance. Now the poor men have the misconception that well earning wife will never get maintenance as common sense dictates, but this is India. Here common sense has no place in courts. The Judges try their level best to grant ridiculous Interim Maintenance to wives, and then the wives simply stop attending the court dates. The cases then drag for years, and Husbands keep on paying monthly maintenance. Famous judgements have asked jobless husbands to Beg, Borrow or Steal, but pay maintenance to their wives. In some cases, men have died in jail for not paying maintenance, differently abled Husbands have been asked to pay maintenance to fully abled wife and physically challenged men have used crowdfunding to fund alimony. Indian Judiciary has no concept of “Durational Maintenance” which is a norm in developed nations, which makes sure wife gets a job instead of becoming a freeloader for life.

The Dreaded Ex Parte

Ex Parte is a legal concept in which if the Respondent (in this case Husband) doesn’t attend the legal proceedings, the court treats it as Ex Parte case and passes orders against him as per the requests of the Petitioner (wife). In most cases, the cunning wives give wrong address of the Husband, so that he doesn’t get the notice served and fails to attend the dates. This leads to the case becoming Ex Parte and the interim orders of exorbitant maintenance are passed, and husband doesn’t even know he owes money till he gets a notice about arrest warrant for not paying maintenance (notice is issued after wife files Execution petition, this time with correct address). In some cases, the eager Judges pass Ex Parte order even the husband and his lawyer miss a single date, because they have the habit of treating the Petitioner as their own daughter. During Covid pandemic, passing of such orders is rampant, as the women organizations and NGOs pressurized the Governments and Judiciary to pass rampant maintenance order to so called aggrieved wives. Obviously these orders can be set aside, but the mental agony and panic it causes to Husbands is unparalleled.

CrPC 125

CrPC 125 is one of those laws which considers women as infants who need support throughout their life. The very definition says that a girl needs to be maintained by the Father till she is unmarried, and post marriage she has to be maintained by her Husband. But Feminists will never protest against this law, like they did vs Adultery Law, because as long as Inequality benefits women, they are fine. In CrPC 125 as well, all maintenance atrocities like Interim Maintenance and Ex Parte apply. The real kicker is, wives file CrPC 125 as well along with DV Act, and get maintenance in both, so the husbands have to fight both cases. But at least now with Rajnesh Vs Neha judgement, courts are asking wives to submit details of all maintenance cases in Income Affidavit.

Conclusion

So, in conclusion, both these laws treat men as bonded labor and a slave for life. Men have to pay maintenance for life, even if the marriage lasted for only 1 day. There is no concept of Durational Maintenance in India, because we are still living in 1950s as per Judiciary. Recently, a woman filed a maintenance case on her husband who is suffering from cancer, and suggested that he should sell his kidney to give her money as he is going to die anyways. So unless men want to get exploited financially and loose their or their parent’s property, they shouldn’t marry. In the next part, we will cover Husband Murder and Dowry Death.

PS: If you are one the unfortunate men who are fighting cases, please head over to MensRights.Net and seek guidance.