In Part 4 we covered how Parental Alienation and POCSO misuse can ruin a man’s life. In this part we will see how/if a man can get divorce from his wife in India. The Indian society and Judiciary is still living in the 1970s. They think that any Indian husband wanting separation from his wife is a criminal and the wife is a helpless victim. So getting divorced in India as a man is literally impossible. Recently, Apex court of India has convinced a woman to take back her cases because if her husband goes to jail, he won’t be able to pay maintenance and ended the separation of 21 years. In one case, the Supreme Court threatened the husband of jail, if he didn’t behave with his wife. We will cover this painful reality in detail.
Contested Divorce=Waste of Time
In India, contested divorce should be renamed as Impossible Divorce. Contested divorce means when an opposite party decides that he/she will ruin the life of the spouse wanting separation, by using the snail paced judiciary at their advantage. When a man files a contested divorce in India, his wife first files entire Fake case package discussed in Part 1 and Part 2 in detail, whether she wants to continue marriage or not. Some do this to get better alimony amount and property (read: extortion), some do just for ego, some do this to threaten the husband so that he takes divorce petition back or some do this just for harassment and sadistic pleasure. Any woman who goes to a lawyer once her husband files divorce, is presented with this fake case package. Most women who are at fault, opt for this readily. Then begins a cat and mouse game of fake cases, court dates, mediations etc. Remember, for Divorce cases, you get a one court date per month (some times once in two months), so at max you get 12 dates per year. In most cases, first 5 to 6 dates are wasted by the wife just to even appear in court, and rest 5-6 dates are wasted by not filing Written Statement (her reply to husband’s petition). So just like that, almost 1 or 2 years are gone, and husband’s situation remains exactly the same, minus the money he spent on lawyer. And then wife’s lawyer uses all the tactics available in the book like asking for mediation, adjournments etc. and around 3-4 years are totally wasted.
Divorce in Higher Courts=More pain
If by some magic, or sheer luck, a husband gets a divorce in lower court/family court, the wife is free to challenge it in Higher courts. So the entire cycle begins again. As the level of courts increases, lawyer fees increase too. Also, High Courts of a state are usually in state capitals or bigger cities, so if you are not located there, husbands have to travel. It just adds on to the misery and time wastage. This simple problem can be solved by making Video conferencing a norm in Indian court hearings, but such sensible decisions are almost never taken in India. Now you must be wondering why the wife will waste her own age fighting cases for years, when the marriage is already broken? No one knows for sure. Its either her extreme stupidity OR lack of sensible parents/friends/well wishers OR just sheer ego/audacity that consumes her sanity and she fights on and on, till she reaches Menopause. There have been instances where husband got divorce for a 20 days marriage after 19 years, and wife has still challenged it in High Court. In one case, wife hid her heart disease from husband, and fought divorce for 16 years. In another case, wife filed multiple fake cases on Husband, cost him his job, and still fought Divorce for 12 years.
Mutual Consent Divorce
Mutual Consent Divorce (MCD) is a divorce in which both husband and wife get separated by agreeing mutually. This case lasts for 6 months (sometimes even a week if 6 months separation period is waived off) in court. 90% of contested divorces end up as MCD. This usually happens when the wife finds her next extortion target and decides its not worth fighting her current husband endlessly. Or the current husband gets her trapped by winning the fake cases and filing criminal defamation or malicious prosecution or perjury. Or the husband just agrees to all demands of his wife. Most of the time, this decision is taken too late by the wife, and nothing meaningful remains in life of either the husband or the wife. Whatever could have happened within first 6 months of separation by cool headed spouses, happens after 6 or sometimes 10 years, because ego takes over common sense.
Conclusion
As you can see, filing divorce by a husband never ends well. I didn’t even cover the grounds of filing a divorce by a husband, or the evidences need to prove the grounds in court. This is simply pointless, as the time to show evidences in court comes after 2-3 years of filing a Divorce case. This is why most MRA organizations never suggest husbands to file divorce. The only good solution to get separated peacefully is actually to never get married in the first place. I haven’t even covered the painful point about alimony and maintenance post divorce, where husbands have been asked to pay maintenance to their working divorced wife, even after their second marriage. Or when husband was asked to pay maintenance even after paying permanent alimony. Or when Supreme Court of India asked Husband to give his wife a house worth Rs 1 crore, despite finding her guilty of cruelty.
With this, I have covered husbands have to go through in the 5 part series of “Why Indian Men shouldn’t marry?”. Please share this with all unmarried men of India, so that they know what is in store for them after marriage. The divorce rates are steadily increasing, they are already around 40% in top cities, and soon the country wide numbers will reach 30% in next 15 years or so.
PS: If an married man needs guidance on how to get separated from his wife, please join MensRights.Net.